Thomas On Rails: Category Me

Silverlinings...

Codejoy — Fri, 23 Jan 2009 21:41:00 -0500

I have had a whirlwind of a past few months, I won't detail the specifics but suffice to say I think I have things under control. I found out I suffer a great deal from anxiety (hey so does Donny Osmond and Scarlett Johanson). I cannot pinpoint how long I have had this. I know its gotten more severe over the years, but I can guess that I had this since the 5th grade at least. How do I know?

I went to Illinois to visit family my 5th grade year (I was what about 11?), it was a nice trip back east and it was during the summer. We made the usual rounds to family members and visited one uncle in particular. He happened to live in some small little town somewhere in Illinois..the visit was nice, though this was summer and a storm rolled in....

We are all standing out there, the clouds aren't looking good and we hear on the news there is a tornado warning for that county where that town is. The thing is, this town is little and has no storm shelters on the house we were in. I and my cousin start to freak out and my grandma, 80+ at the time I think, was tired and just decided during this crisis she will take a nap on the couch. Makes me chuckle now.

Anyway, after that trip when I got back to New Mexico, for over a year I was obsessed with the weather. It is well known in the late summers here we get some wicked thunderstorms and every time we had one I would freak out. In fact I realize my sixth grade year just starring out the school bus at the clouds, fretting about the weather, hoping it wouldn't bring something akin to a tornado. The worse part is, the worry would be in the back of my head playing or doing whatever. Its odd to me that to this day I can remember the exact feelings of worries i had, what I was thinking, concerned about and this many years ago, like 19 or so. Jeez.

Mental issues are difficult to deal with, it depends on the issue, the person, the context, the environment and you will really never know what its like unless its you. Anxiety is particularly horrible, cause the worries are perfectly logical to us, but totally unlogical and absurd to an outside observer

It was quite a while I fretted about the tornadoes and weather, but it finally just went away, and now the silver lining is, I chase storms, or want to...I love them. So I am at a new place, and hopefully better equipped now to control this rather vicious little issue that really degrades ones quality of life...time will tell, sooner or later time will tell.

A good week

Codejoy — Tue, 10 Jun 2008 13:32:00 -0400

you know its going to be a good week when you see this: The reboot has finished, well I think and I even got wind that I might get the phone number of a long lost friend soon...that makes me very excited.

Reboot 5 & 6

Codejoy — Tue, 03 Jun 2008 11:56:00 -0400

SYSTEM FAN

System.out.println("Reboot Day 5: Work on small project, it improves the house and shows off your artzy side.");

System.out.println("Reboot day 6: Be funny at work...");

COWORKER: "My sister is dating a Nigerian"

ME: "Umm was this Via an Email?"

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

Reboot day 4.

Codejoy — Mon, 02 Jun 2008 02:00:00 -0400

CHKDSK ..... ok.

System.out.println("Reboot day 4. Clean, throwout, decorate for the first time in nearly 2 years.");

System.out.println("Weekend synopsis: More productive than i've been in weeks.");

Reboot day 3.

Codejoy — Sun, 01 Jun 2008 00:59:00 -0400

INSTALLING DAMEON.../\/\/\/

System.out.println("Reboot day 3. Work, and do good work, whatever you are be a good one.");

System.out.println("Work hard play hard.");

Reboot day 2.

Codejoy — Fri, 30 May 2008 11:40:00 -0400

POST CHKSUM ... ... ... complete

printf("Day 2: Clean out the old...not just a clean up but a clean out. Even going so far as getting a box that says 'past' or 'memories'\n");

Rebooting

Codejoy — Tue, 27 May 2008 14:27:56 -0400

You know when computers crash, or freeze you typically fix such errors by rebooting them. Sometimes, I think human beings need the same thing... It has been an interesting few months, a pretty introspective few months. That being said, its time to do a bit of personal house cleaning. That means, my flickr stream will be cleaned up to *MY* specifications...my blogs might as well, in addition though most you won't see this. It will finally be time to "move" into my house. Decorating the walls, clearing out old stuff... in general moving forward (i hope). So why the need to blog about this? I dunno...a warning, a statement, whatever it is...its been said.

End of the semester

Codejoy — Thu, 08 May 2008 11:19:00 -0400

I learned a lot in the photography class I took this semester. Primarily how to make a good print on both Resin Coated (RC) paper and Fiber Base paper (FB). To me there is something very special about making a picture by hand from start to finish. From the moment you click the shutter, to developing the negative to the enlarging process to even pressing and mounting the final print. Here is my final project, as to which the teacher said it was one of the best final projects he has seen in a photo I class. Mission accomplished. I am now actively working on my next goal.

It's the small things...

Codejoy — Sun, 17 Feb 2008 14:23:00 -0500

You know its funny, it seems when you are down if you have kids they can tell, they just know. They give more hugs and kisses than usual and generally take it easy on ya. I think this could be something just innate in human beings. The strangest thing happened today, it was small but totally what I needed as a pick-me-up. I goto get a haircut today, and it was the BEST haircut I ever got. Not cause the end result was me looking less like the mac dude, but because the lady gave me special treatment. It started off by a shoulder and neck massage (I've never gotten this) and then the hair cut itself she took her time with and made it look good, after that she actually took me to get the hair rinsed and washed (usually I get a haircut, its snip snip and i'm on my way). The massage was fantastic, the rinse and wash as fantastic, the simple act of her going the extra mile really made my day and damn if the neck massage didn't feel good. I even caught wind her son was getting married and dropped off my business card for her suggesting they start looking for a photographer. My day went from blah to hoorah from a simple act of someone going the extra mile.

Light and Form

Codejoy — Sun, 10 Feb 2008 10:55:00 -0500

No this isn't an example of it, but that is my new assignment. Also we learned how to make our first print. It is quite a process consisting of making test prints, using filters, and printing again. I look forward to it though. I am at this new part of my life where hopefully I can really jump into this stuff fully and churn out some real art. I always felt my stuff is more or less just "there", not quite commercial enough for commercial, and not artzy enough for art. I aim to change that. That being said I am also in an interesting point in life, a point I should of been at for sometime so that being said I might "emote" some on this blog, and if so I do apologize. Oh and this picture was not for the class or the first project at all, just figured i'd post something new....